Mar 042014

Anger Management &
Dispute Resolutions, the Christ’s Way.

Today pressures and stress from economic hardship, sickness, crime, and relationship problems makes people to be overly aggressive to family members, to co-workers, and to their school mates. To some extends, it has led some people to result to school shootings, workplace violence and domestic violence. Several books has been written by experts in conflict resolution and in anger management. The efforts of these experts has not stop the increase in workplace violence, the school shootings and domestic violence. Why? Because it is natural for humans to want to revenge and to pay back evil with evil and the vicious cycle has no end.

However hope is not lost because our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ is a master of conflict revolution and anger management. The following Scriptures will guide us on how to resolve dispute among our fellow humans and to live peacefully with all people.

In the Book of Matthew 18:15-18 Jesus made the following statements,

“If your brother sins against you, go to him and show him his fault. But do it privately, just between yourselves. If he listens to you, you have won your brother back. But if he will not listen to you, take one or two other persons with you, so that ‘every accusation may be upheld by the testimony of two or more witnesses,’ as the scripture says. And if he will not listen to them, then tell the whole thing to the church. Finally, if he will not listen to the church, treat him as though he were a pagan or a tax collector”(Matthew 18:15-17)


What are the steps to settle disagreement?

How can we apply this in our home?

Does this apply to criminal activities, like stealing, rape and violence crime?

How many of us agree that we should adopt Jesus Disputes resolution method by show of hands?

What is Murder according to Jesus?

“You have heard that people were told in the past, ‘Do not commit murder; anyone who does will be brought to trial.’
But now I tell you: whoever is angry with his brother will be brought to trial, whoever calls his brother ‘You good-for-nothing!’ will be brought before the Council, and whoever calls his brother a worthless fool will be in danger of going to the fire of hell.
So if you are about to offer your gift to God at the altar and there you remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar, go at once and make peace with your brother, and then come back and offer your gift to God.

What are some of the gifts we usually offer to God?

What does Jesus say we should do first before we offer gift to God?

Why is this important before we can offer prayers to God?

Why does Jesus liking been angry with your neighbour to Murder?

What should we do before we offer prayers and praises to God if we remember
Someone had offended us?

What can you do if someone Sue You?

“If someone brings a lawsuit against you and takes you to court, settle the dispute with him while there is time, before you get to court. Once you are there, he will hand you over to the judge, who will hand you over to the police, and you will be put in jail. There you will stay, I tell you, until you pay the last penny of your fine. (Matthew 5:21-26 GNB)

What can you do if someone Sue You?

Godly Qualities of Forgiveness.

“Accordingly, as God’s chosen ones, holy and loved, clothe yourselves with the tender affections of compassion, kindness, lowliness of mind, mildness, and long-suffering. 13 Continue putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely if anyone has a cause for complaint against another. Even as Jehovah freely forgave YOU, so do YOU also. 14 But, besides all these things, [clothe yourselves with] love, for it is a perfect bond of union.( Colossians 3: 12-14)

What are some of the qualities that help us to forgive others?

What are the steps to settle disagreement?

How can we apply this in our work place, in our church and in the family members?

The Parable of Unforgiven Slaves.

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, if my brother keeps on sinning against me, how many times do I have to forgive him? Seven times?” “No, not seven times,” answered Jesus, “but seventy times seven, because the Kingdom of heaven is like this.

Once there was a king who decided to check on his servants’ accounts. He had just begun to do so when one of them was brought in who owed him millions of pounds. The servant did not have enough to pay his debt, so the king ordered him to be sold as a slave, with his wife and his children and all that he had, in order to pay the debt. The servant fell on his knees before the king. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay you everything!’ The king felt sorry for him, so he forgave him the debt and let him go.

“Then the man went out and met one of his fellow-servants who owed him a few pounds. He grabbed him and started choking him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he said. His fellow-servant fell down and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back!’ But he refused; instead, he had him thrown into jail until he should pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were very upset and went to the king and told him everything. So he called the servant in. ‘You worthless slave!’ he said. ‘I forgave you the whole amount you owed me, just because you asked me to. You should have had mercy on your fellow-servant, just as I had mercy on you.’ The king was very angry, and he sent the servant to jail to be punished until he should pay back the whole amount.” And Jesus concluded, “That is how my Father in heaven will treat every one of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.” (Matthew 18:15-17, 21-35 GNB)

What can we do to avoid the attitude of unforgiving slave?

How can we apply this to our marriage partners?

How can we apply this to co workers.

Benefits of forgiveness?

“If you forgive others the wrongs they have done to you, your Father in heaven will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive the wrongs you have done. (Matthew 6:14, 15 GNB)

Why should we forgive others their sins?

How can we apply this to our family members, Your Husband, Your Wife, your Children?

Love Your Enemies.

“But I tell you who hear me: love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who ill-treat you. If anyone hits you on one cheek, let him hit the other one too; if someone takes your coat, let him have your shirt as well. Give to everyone who asks you for something, and when someone takes what is yours, do not ask for it back.

Do for others just what you want them to do for you. “If you love only the people who love you, why should you receive a blessing? Even sinners love those who love them! And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you receive a blessing? Even sinners do that! And if you lend only to those from whom you hope to get it back, why should you receive a blessing? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount!
No! Love your enemies and do good to them; lend and expect nothing back. You will then have a great reward, and you will be children of the Most High God.

What is the benefit of praying for your enemies?

How we apply this to our co-workers?

Do not Judge Others
For he is good to the ungrateful and the wicked. Be merciful just as your Father is merciful. “Do not judge others, and God will not judge you; do not condemn others, and God will not condemn you; forgive others, and God will forgive you. Give to others, and God will give to you. Indeed, you will receive a full measure, a generous helping, poured into your hands — all that you can hold. The measure you use for others is the one that God will use for you.”

The parable of a Blind man.

And Jesus told them this parable: “One blind man cannot lead another one; if he does, both will fall into a ditch. No pupil is greater than his teacher; but every pupil, when he has completed his training, will be like his teacher.

“Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but pay no attention to the log in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Please, brother, let me take that speck out of your eye,’ yet cannot even see the log in your own eye? You hypocrite! First take the log out of your own eye, and then you will be able to see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye. (Luke 6:27-42 GNB)

Why should we not judge others?

How to conquered The World.
Whoever believes that Jesus is the Messiah is a child of God; and whoever loves a father loves his child also. This is how we know that we love God’s children: it is by loving God and obeying his commands. For our love for God means that we obey his commands. And his commands are not too hard for us, because every child of God is able to defeat the world. And we win the victory over the world by means of our faith. Who can defeat the world? Only the person who believes that Jesus is the Son of God. (1 John 5:1-5 GNB)

How can we conquer the world?

“Do everything possible on your part to live in peace with everybody. Never take revenge, my friends, but instead let God’s anger do it. For the scripture says, “I will take revenge, I will pay back, says the Lord.” Instead, as the scripture says: “If your enemies are hungry, feed them; if they are thirsty, give them a drink; for by doing this you will make them burn with shame.” Do not let evil defeat you; instead, conquer evil with good”.(Romans 12:18-21 GNB)

Who’s job is to revenge?

Why should we leave revenge to God?

In conclusion, The former President of South African, Nelson Mandela, said, and I quote “Grudges is a poison that you keep within yourself, hoping it will kill your enemies”. From the above we can only conquer and win our enemies by obeying our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, by praying for our enemies to have a change of hearts. This seem to be very difficult for us as an imperfect humans but it works like miracle. Yahweh, our God said, “vengeance is mine and do not avenge yourself”. Therefore, Let us live vengeance and revenge to God. He will reward us with peace of mind now and everlasting life in the future. If you follow Jesus counsels and it did not work for you, tell me to stop following Jesus.

What did Former President of South Africa said, about grudge?

What disease can result from keeping grudges?

Heart diseases, High Blood Pressures, Cancers, hormonal skin disorders.

What are the benefits of not harbouring grudges?

This Article was Written By: The Jesus Witness Ministries corp.


The Goodness Bible
The Amplifier Bible
The New World Translation Bible